


Back Of the Sea

by carolinecrane



Series: Retrograde [14]
Category: CSI: Miami
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-02-21
Updated: 2004-02-21
Packaged: 2018-05-28 01:39:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6309211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolinecrane/pseuds/carolinecrane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Speed learns to reach out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Back Of the Sea

Matt hadn't even gotten off the phone yet and already Speed knew letting him in was a huge mistake. Not that he'd had much choice - Matt more or less invited himself in, and it wasn't like Speed could stop him in front of Tyler. Tyler who was going to want an explanation after all this, because Speed hadn't been able to get rid of him fast enough and that was the worst thing he could have done.

He heard Matt say goodbye a second before he hung up the phone, arms crossed over his chest as Matt turned to face him. "Happy?"

"What is with you? If you'd called her when you said you would we wouldn't be having this conversation."

"Relax, man, you're more wound up about it than she is. It's no big deal."

Speed rolled his eyes but let it go - it felt a little weird to be standing in his own living room with his brother, and mostly he just wanted to find out what Matt wanted so he'd leave again. They didn't know each other, but they were family, and Speed knew they should. He knew Tyler was probably at home right now, wondering _why_ Speed had seemed so unhappy to see his brother. But answering that question meant answering a lot of other questions he wasn't so sure he was ready to talk about, and he had no idea what to do about it.

"Why are you here, anyway?" he asked for the second time, watching as Matt wandered around the room, picking things up at random and setting them back down again. "Shouldn't you be at a party or something with your friends?"

Matt shrugged and turned to face him, grin firmly in place, and that was an expression Speed didn't recognize. "Plenty of time to party," he answered. "It's not often I'm in the same town with my only brother, though. Figured I'd drop in and say hey."

He wasn't buying that for a second, not when Matt had a bunch of friends waiting for him back at his hotel. It had been years since they'd even seen each other, and Speed couldn't remember a time when they'd had an actual conversation. He had a feeling this had something to do with their parents, but he knew Matt wasn't going to tell him. That was one thing he _did_ know about his brother - Matt could be just as stubborn as the rest of the family when he wanted to be.

"So are you here for the week or what?"

"Give or take," Matt said, turning his back on Speed again. It wasn't really an answer, but before Speed could figure out what Matt meant he was talking again. "Listen, your friend didn't leave because of me, did he? What's his name again? Taylor?"

"Tyler," Speed answered, frowning at the mention of Tyler's name. He'd managed to forget about that situation for a whole minute, but as soon as Matt mentioned Tyler the conversation he didn't want to have came rushing back. It was bad enough that Matt had told their mother he was dating someone, but explaining his family to Tyler meant explaining David.

He'd been telling himself since the beginning that David was the past and Tyler didn't need to know about it, but there was no way to explain any of this without explaining all of it. And if he didn't bring it up Tyler might not ask, but the question would be there between them anyway, and eventually it would drive Tyler away. He wanted to believe that was for the best - he'd been trying to convince himself it was true since their first date - but even he wasn't buying it anymore.

"Tyler, right," Matt said, nodding at Speed's bookshelf as he scanned the titles. "So how long you guys been together?"

"Awhile," Speed answered, frowning at the back of Matt's head.

Matt turned to look at him then, still smiling and Speed found himself wondering what exactly Matt knew. Only there was no way he could know anything, not when he'd only been in town for a day. "Look, I didn't mean to ruin your plans or anything."

"It's fine," Speed said. "I mean you didn't ruin anything. Don't worry about it."

"You sure about that? Because your boyfriend looked a little annoyed when you kicked him out. Wait, let me guess…he didn't know you even had a brother."

"He knew," Speed shot back, although the truth was that he wasn't sure whether or not he'd ever mentioned Matt. "Look…"

"Relax," Matt said again, grinning in that way that made Speed feel like he was missing something. "I'm going. I'm not looking to cramp your style or anything, I just figured since I was in the neighborhood anyway…"

Speed rolled his eyes when Matt trailed off, telling himself to let it go even as he said the words. "Look, you're here already, at least have something to eat before you go."

"Thanks, I'll pass." Matt took a few steps towards the entrance to the living room, pausing just before he reached the hall. "Dad'll get a kick out of hearing that you're trying to feed people, though."

Speed tried and failed to stifle a grin at that, the corners of his mouth twitching as he followed Matt to the door. "So are you planning on dropping in again before you go back to Syracuse?"

Matt paused with his hand on the front door, glancing over his shoulder and shrugging. "I'm kinda playing things by ear right now. I'll let you know."

And now he was sure there was something Matt wasn't telling him, but he let it slide and held out his hand. For a second Matt just stared at it like he wasn't sure what Speed wanted, but he finally gripped Speed's hand and gave it an awkward shake. When he let go again Speed took a step forward, holding the door open as Matt stepped out of the apartment. "Listen, be careful down here, okay? It's easy to overdo it and get yourself in trouble. The cops are gunning for underage drinkers, and there are drunks all over the road…"

"Tim, man, chill," Matt interrupted. "I can take care of myself."

He nodded once, swallowing another lecture on how easy it was to get caught up in the heat of the moment. Matt was an adult now, after all, and he probably could take care of himself. He held up a hand when Matt glanced back over his shoulder, waving awkwardly before he shut the door and leaned hard against it.

Calling the past half hour of his life weird would be an understatement, but it was the best word Speed could think of to describe it. He still had no idea what Matt wanted, if he'd gotten it or if he'd be back to try again. He thought about calling his mother and asking if she had any idea what Matt was up to, but he had a feeling she was just as clueless as he was. Besides, calling her meant answering a bunch of awkward questions, and he wasn't ready to face that yet.

When he did pick up the phone he dialed another number, closing his eyes at the sound of Tyler's voice when he picked up. "Hey."

"Hey," Tyler said, surprise and something else in his voice making Speed's heart skip a beat. "I didn't expect to hear from you tonight."

"I know," Speed answered, swallowing a fresh surge of guilt. "Listen, about before…I'm sorry. My brother just showing up like that kind of threw me."

"Don't worry about it. He's not gone already, is he?"

"Yeah. He's down here with his friends, he doesn't want to hang around me," Speed said. He wasn't entirely sure that was true - it seemed like Matt was holding back something, but he was the one who'd showed up out of nowhere and then disappeared just as fast, so Speed wasn't going to waste a bunch of time trying to figure out why. "Guess you should have stuck around after all."

"Well if you're hungry you can come over. I made Fettuccini Alfredo."

"You did?" And he knew he sounded shocked, but he was too tired and too confused to try to hide it.

When Tyler laughed on the other end of the line he found himself smiling, relaxing for the first time all day. "You don't have to sound so surprised. You're the one who taught me to cook."

"Sorry."

"Forget it," Tyler said, and Speed closed his eyes so he could picture that smile on the other end of the line. "So are you coming over or what? I think there's even some forensics thing on Court TV tonight."

He was still getting used to the fact that Tyler knew him so well, but he had to admit that dinner and vegging in front of the TV sounded pretty much perfect. He was already reaching for his keys before he answered, the phone cradled between his shoulder and his ear as he opened the closet and pulled out a jacket. "I'll be right over."

"Good," Tyler said, his voice promising a lot more than just dinner and a little TV. A shudder ran down his spine as he hung up the phone; he knew they still had a lot to talk about, but it would wait a little while longer. He was pretty sure his brother wouldn't show up again tomorrow, anyway, and if they didn't get to conversation until then it wouldn't hurt anything.


End file.
